The Wrong Way to Buy a Motorcycle
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Minnie Mouse: Cute or Slutty?
Sometime last year, some cast members at Disneyland in Paris let their plushie ways creep out in front of a camera. You just can't keep a good mouse down.
Labels: Disney Gone Wild
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God Finally Has To Defend Himself in Court
A Nebraska State Senator is suing God. Here he is pictured in front of a big fan, looking as angelic as ever.
This brings up some very stupid questions: When God gets sued, does he represent himself? I would think He'd be the most qualified attorney in the universe. Actually, given that it's lawyerly duties we're talking about, wouldn't he retain Satan as his counsel? Maybe he's the best. If not, who the hell is his attorney? Would he appear in court? Would he look more like George Burns or Morgan Freeman? Would he have to swear on a Bible? If Senator Dingledork were to win his case, how would he collect? What if ...
Aaahhh!!! The questions are burning a hole in my brain!! It's all so stupid! Make it stop! Make it stop!
my daughter Iana just learned about the Creation in Genesis. The thing that aroused her curiosity most was the 7th day. God took a break! Why? he was tired, and needed some diversion -- from what? you might wonder, since "the earth is the Lord's and the fullness thereof." So where does a Supreme Being go on his day off? There was no Disneyland, no rides, and just two humans. Definitely don't want to hang out with the humans. This was a few eons before cafe lattes and the Sunday New York Times. In fact it was a Saturday, wasn't it? Way before the invention of porches, or Porsches for that matter. And what is there to get away from?
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Senator Larry Craig Creams and Dreams
Damn. YouTube says "We're sorry, this video is no longer available." I'll bet the soundtrack was that mellifluous corporate anthem, "My Bathroom Is A Special Kind of Place." Am I right?
# posted by 
: February 22, 2008 3:46 PM
: February 22, 2008 3:46 PM
Hmm. I can still get it.
Yes, this soundtrack is from the My Bathroom song. I sent it to an old friend and he worked his magic.
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Yes, this soundtrack is from the My Bathroom song. I sent it to an old friend and he worked his magic.
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Another good use for Scotch tape
Attention frat boys! It's very dangerous to pass out drunk when your friends are still awake. Don't say we didn't warn you.
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Pluto Just Can't Take It Anymore
A few years ago, 99 and I were forced, through family obligation, to go to Disney World in Orlando for a day. I personally, have always hated the concept of there being a "Happiest place on Earth". I mean, even if it were possible to figure out what is the happiest place on Earth, do you really think it's possible to manufacture it out of plastic, sponsorships and focus-group generated cartoon characters? The idea that you can shell out over $60 and be promised that "YOU WILL BE HAPPY" seems completely psychotic. In fact, this promise creates a very high expectation and tends to make unhappy feelings erupt from every orifice. To wit: when we were sitting at a cafe on Main Street, eating a cone of the happiest ice cream on Earth, we saw a nice family walking down the street, one of thousands, except that the husband was punching his wife in the head and yelling at her. Freakin' amazing. I don't think she was happy.
So, we now begin a new series entitled Disney Gone Wild. Here's chapter one:
So, we now begin a new series entitled Disney Gone Wild. Here's chapter one:
Labels: Disney Gone Wild, video
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Precious Taft on the Joys of Parenthood and Radiators
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Delicious Lunch Treat or Shortest Path To Cardiac Arrest?
Today, Pizza Hut in Japan has released what they call the Pizza Hut Double Roll. When everyone else is still offering up that tired old cheese-stuffed crust, PH takes us to all new level by stuffing their's with mini hot dogs. We here at the Friday Afternoon Sound Alternative salute this grand science experiment and offer one of our own. We will place a case of these pizzas in a room along with a month's supply of Zocor, Vytorin, Lipitor, and baby aspirin. After two weeks, the last man standing will be crowned King of Cardiovascular.
Labels: japanese
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Hope You Guess My Name
Our inside sources tell us that The Dick has taken to wearing cowboy hats and trench coats in public to cover his horns and tail.
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How to Escape a Fart
Japanese scientists are at it again. It's obvious that this was a tongue-in-cheek (ugh!) video, but is it funnier because we don't understand Japanese?
http://view.break.com/311432 - Watch more free videos
http://view.break.com/311432 - Watch more free videos
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